In the Air (non-linear)

In the air

The lights in the cabin were dimmed out; I leaned back in the seat, staring at the outside and waiting for landing. The flight had been in the air for fourteen hours; nothing except the pure darkness had accompanied the plane since it took off. When the vague clusters of glitters at the far horizon turned brighter and more vivid, I knew I would return to the inexhaustible variety of life soon. Landing used to bring me anxiety and excitement; however, overlooking the light approaching, I perceived a strange feeling this time. Was it relief or serenity? I could not tell. While I was tangled with my thoughts, the plane touched the ground. The engines rumbled; the frame trembled; after taxing for a moment, the plane stopped at the apron. Glancing at the night sky through the windows, I wish I could stay in the air forever.

I love the feeling of being in the air. Flying on a cloudy day, I enjoy the time going through the clouds, being surrounded by whiteness, and quietly appreciating the time passing. I am also amazed by the other side of the clouds; they look more charming from above. Flying on a sunny day, I can look far into distance; the fusion of colors at the horizon cannot be seen in any paintings in the world. During a night flight, I am able to observe the vast universe and taste the darkness. Flying back and forth, I am enchanted by everything I see and feel. Before this flight taking off, somehow, I looked up into the sky and wondered curiously: “When I am in the air, overlooking everything in the world and the nature, am I within or without them? If I can choose, which one do I want to be?

It was at the sun set when the plane was taking off. After being in the air for several minutes, an innocent and surprising voice came from the back cabin: “Mom! Look! Cloud!” I looked outside the window, there was a small piece of cloud floating by itself. On the dark blue background of the sky, the golden and crimson color of the setting sun was reflecting from its exterior. Its unique rectangular shape and pure-white interior were attractive; being an outlier also made it memorable. Even though that piece was separated from the clusters, it was still floating peacefully and calmly. I appreciated that piece of cloud. Suddenly, I found the answer to my question. When I was in the air, I was without everything. I would like to be isolated, like that lonely cloud in the sky.

I chose to fly in the air without the world interrupting me. For the first time, I travelled without internet on this long-distance flight. There was neither messages nor news, but only a circle ceaselessly spinning on the white phone screen. Feeling helpless, bored, and agitated, I started to play games. My thumb repetitively moved up and down, without purpose or meaning; before long, I gave up. Living in the normal world was liking playing mobile games; no matter how good a player I was, I could never escape the control and restrictions of programs. Nevertheless, being in the air kept me away from the games and programs. I got a chance to focus on reading and thinking. Hawking’s book about the origin of the universe gave me a god view of the world; within the book, I could overlook the time and go through the history. Being isolated in the air preserved my independence as well; I could think objectively without any outside influence. Staying without the world, I also observed something that I had never realized when being within.

After sitting in the seat for several hours, I stood up to exercise my muscles. Walking to the back along the aisle, I noticed a mother and a child. The child seemed to be asleep with only a t-shirt. His mother unfolded the blanket and tried to cover his body. To my surprise, the boy threw it on the floor immediately and told his mom: “I am hot. I don’t need your care.” What he said sounded familiar; I could not remember how many times I had said this to my parents before. However, after travelling in the air without my parents’ care countless times, I understood that boy now. I could never see the whole when I was within it; similarly, I had never realized the love from my parents when I was within their love. When I was talking back to my seat, I heard that boy sneezing. I smiled. I was sure he would discover something when he was alone in the air next time.

After getting off the plane, I texted my parents and assured them that I would be safe. I checked the information board and knew that my flight to Portland would be delayed for five hours. However, I was calm without any impatience or rage, because the flight had brought me an uninterruptable mind. It would stay in the air, being “without” since then.