Tick….Tock….Tick….Tock….Tick….Tock. Decisions. Decisions. You have to make a decision but you’re not quite certain exactly what to do. You eventually decide to just play it safe. Nothing different. Same old you. There are numerous intangible things that someone carries throughout their life. These burdens, although some may not be, influence how your life is shaped. Personally, silence has been the thing I have carried throughout my life and it has impacted my life in ways that are for the better and worse.
Silence can drive some crazy; however, for me it provides an enhanced ability to observe. Throughout my elementary and middle school years I moved between numerous schools. I began kindergarten enrolled in Crescent Park Elementary. After one year, my parents made the executive decision to send me to Boxbury Elementary in Oxford. Then after a troubling experience, I was homeschooled for around two years. Homeschooling was a great experience, even though it did put a lot of stress on my Mother; however, I learned much more than I would have if I had gone to Crescent Park. Unfortunately, my parents decided once again to send me to Crescent Park for my fourth and fifth grade years. Then after growing accustomed with the students in Bethel, I switched schools for my sixth grade year. That year I went to the Hebron Academy Middle School, but it was short lived. Due to a number of reasons I switched schools yet again. For seventh and eighth grade I went to the Telstar Middle School. Overall, I switched schools six times within a period of eight years. I have always been incredibly quiet since I was young, but swapping schools and friends every year or so made it extremely difficult to be as socially active as other students. With that being said, I still had friends. I was not a loner, or an outcast. Sports helped me a lot with that; however, I was still not especially outspoken. As a result, at lunch or in the classroom I would sit there and enjoy my silence. Often times in the dining hall at Hebron today I will sit at the end of a table at the far side of the dining hall and just watch and listen like a high-flying bird. Looking at people’s habits, things said at other tables. Every single detail. I would note how people interacted with each other, trying to understand what type of relationship they held at that moment. Often I will not say a single word at a table.
This is not a lesson of how silence can affect you negatively. Sure, I wasn’t conversing with others at the rate that some do; however, in the classroom it proves to be extremely helpful at times. Numerous occasions have arose when a teacher has been trying to teach and someone else was talking over them. I can see the stare that the teacher begins to develop. That stare, almost sympathetic, mostly annoyed. The waiting. I do not say anything, I just wait for the student to eventually realize their inconsideration, or be strictly told off by the teacher. Silence has made me far more observant and considerate than most.
Tick….Tock….Tick….Tock…. Silence. Similarly to a soldier waiting and listening for things, taking note, I wait and listen. Taking note of interactions. Silence is the thing I carry, and others should as well. Silence is a virtue.
This was quite personal for me. Writing it was certainly not easy and in attempt to not reveal as much I ended up putting in a lot of cannon fodder, such as all of the schools I went to.
I really like this narrative because it’s so relatable and so obviously you. I like the figurative language spread out through it and the amusing anecdotes you added in it, there was a little bit of repetition but not much. I understand your connection to silence and moving schools a lot. I’ve been to around eleven different schools overall, and moving so much made me a pretty private person, but also gave me the opportunity to form friendships all around the country.
I think this is a very accurate and well written introspection piece, something that is very hard to do. I think it is done very well and is enhanced by the figurative language such as the simile comparing yourself to a bird overhead, watching over everything.
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