And The Summer Was Over

“Ry, let’s go, we’re going to be late for Drivers Ed.” And I was off, realizing as I was being chauffeured, it was now my time to step up to the plate and drive. It was the norm after all these years to just slide into the passenger’s seat. I could feel my nerves and excitement as it was now my time to cross the threshold from passenger to driver.  I entered the class naive to the rules of driving. But, thanks to the instructor, Mr. Dingley, I became enlightened to the rules of the road. The three hours flew by on the clock, and I was soon to be on the road in the driver’s seat. Days later, while driving, I could hear Ben in the back
saying;

“Kapp, don’t kill us.” I responded

“Don’t worry about it” then almost went off the road. I continued my cautious driving for two long, grueling hours while swerving side to side to dodge cars and remain in the correct lane. After barely arriving back at the school safely, I had never been so excited and relieved to be greeted by my Mom in her van waiting for me to hop in the old, familiar passenger seat. The instructor said;

“Don’t worry it is only the beginning. Everything will get better.” It never did. I contemplated my nerves and thought this was ridiculous, I should not be scared to get behind the wheel, but the nerves never left. Even with me constantly telling myself  “you got this” and “relax, don’t worry”.

As the clock kept ticking, my second time to drive was fast approaching. I was starting to breath heavily and was trembling with nerves. As I stepped on the gas pedal and accelerated gaining speed, the fresh air and air conditioning was keeping me calm. After one long and stressful hour of driving, I finally heard Mr. Dingley say “Ok, good, pull in here and switch.” A  smile spread across my face and a calmness I hadn’t felt overcame me as I realized I had completed my hour without harming anyone. My confidence was bubbling through the roof, and I could  now sit back as a passenger and enjoy a nice hour while Ben was driving.

Parallel parking was a big setback for my confidence. After almost hitting a few cars, and putting the car in reverse at the wrong time, we were back to square one. My on and off nerves continued for the remainder of the ten hours of driving.

I pulled into the school parking lot for the final time, relieved and content, I was ready to get my permit. After sitting for what seemed like an eternity, my number was called and it was time to become a legal driver. I could feel my excitement, confidence and maturity grow as I stepped closer to the counter. My confidence was quickly deflated when the man asked;

“Let me see the paperwork.” I responded

“Funny story about that actually.”  Once again, confidence, the feeling of being mature and responsibility vanished. I had gone all this way, waited in line for so long, and neglected to do the paperwork. After completing the forms, and the guy getting annoyed, I finally had my permit. My mom asked;So, will you drive home?” I quickly answered 

“Not a chance.” Days, weeks, months flew by and I would assume my comfortable position in the passenger’s seat. Out of the blue, I  regained my confidence and maturity. I said

“Dad, I’m going to drive.” He laughed and said “Okay, go for it.” I got settled in, turned the key, and began driving. It was easier than I had even imagined. I quickly settled in making turns, backing up and driving. I did not know what the big deal had been. This began to be a weekly event, he would hand me the keys, and we were off. I could feel myself finding my groove and there was no stopping me now. Hours passed, and I was still on top of the world as a driver and as a person. The day came to a close, and I asked my Dad;

“How many driving hours should I put down?” He responded

“None, you’ve been driving a golf cart when we play, that’s not real driving.”

Even though technically I wasn’t really driving, it gave me more confident and I felt mature.  I could finally tell “the summer was over”, even if there are still some little kid moments along the way.