Chandeliers have never lit a room so dimly. The carpet suffocates underneath your leather heels as you make your way toward me, the certain destination you yearned to reach. You smell like weed which makes me feel less queasy than last time. Last time the vodka I could smell it so clearly that it burned in the back of my eyes. Your scent lingering in the high point of the bridge of my nose deep between my eyes. Your arms lingering around me after a drowning embrace. I’ll never forget that hotel. I’ll never forget that night. I sat in large velvet chairs that made me feel like I was sinking into more than just dread.
“It’s great to see you”
I wish it was. I wish I knew why. I wish I felt the same way back. I wish I could lead you to a dark room, not the other way around. You always told me I was too greedy, I wanted too much. But that was playful. When you brought me hot chocolate. Things as simple as Kraft Mac and Cheese and Ramen were made for me. Now I’m given expensive brunches and I get to perch under crystal lighting in soft chairs meant for queens like I was a chickadee waiting for things to be given to me. I wish I was a blue jay, I took what I wanted. I fought for what I wanted. I fight for what I want.
The elevator stood still as if it was watching someone who dropped their change on a tile floor. A simple action made for such a loud reaction. The doors spread apart like the separation of me and- well any separation. She yearned for a loud noise, some climactic annoyance of each step his dirty soul made toward their hotel room. But the carpet just absorbed the abuse deep inside itself. No screaming, no creaking, no crying. Quick paced silent steps put her in first place. A race to their hotel room. She could not stand trailing behind a sickly smell moving at such a slow pace. She needed to make it to the hotel room. She wanted it to be over. So she decided that she would be the leader. And suddenly she was lowest on the social chain, lower than a follower, lower than a peasant.
“A little tight, huh?”
That’s when he slapped my ass. Like a girl in a music video. The music videos that teenage girls of today’s world obsess over. I was a girl in the moment. Not Sophie Chu-O’Neil, but a female. And he could do whatever he wanted to me because of that. Last time I said I love you and goodbye I meant it in a light way. This time it was more bitter. My teeth stung after every consonant, piercing my heart how little I meant the words I said. The guilt will always be there. More than just the moment. More than a slap. More than feeling like an object. Not the worst pain I’ve ever felt, but the worst degradation I’ve ever felt.
“I love you.”
It will never mean what it used to after the time spent in that hotel. After the day you gripped my wrist last fall. The day you held my one wish over my head. This was not dinner you were serving me this was my future and by holding that over my head you lost my love. I’m sorry. I will always be sorry for not loving you anymore. I will always feel guilty that I couldn’t value blood over water, but I do. I will die of dehydration if all I have is your blood to survive on.
I wanted to read this piece in class because what we carry is less of a weight on our shoulders but more of a weight dragging down our happiness. For this essay, I disregarded the prompt. This is supposed to be about what I carry, but this is more than that. I can let go of what I am burdened with carrying. But this is different. This is something that consumed me like a parasite. This lives and breathes inside me. We don’t talk about these things in class; no one knows about the things that one another are truly absorbed by. This is shallow, the bare minimum, yet still too deep to be shared with a class of twelve or so kids. Anything ‘too deep’ is not what is carried, but what consumes us. So here I stay bound by guilt, consumed by each bee sting on the tips of his fingers with no one to tell.
America began as an immoral country and has not developed more quality values to this day. The realization of this lack of growth is what will provoke the nation to engage in moving toward better core principles. A faulty beginning primed America to become a nation that functions toxically on both large and small scales. This toxicity has affected not just the country, but the individuals’ outlooks born within it. The cost of this is America’s inwardly detrimental social system. Poor morals can be recognized in more than just the common man, but also the public and political figures of the country. Likewise, distorted ideas of success defiled the fundamentals of the American population during Puritan times and have continued to haunt every generation after it. America built toxicity into the way society functions. The origination of these toxic fundamentals are represented through the play, The Crucible by Arthur Miller, and the novel, The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne. Both pinpoint the flawed moral compasses of their variety of intriguing characters, some proving to be shockingly unethical through the conflicts that arise as the story moves forwards. However, unethical behavior is not only recognized in America’s past but also in the nation’s current politics. An article titled Kavanaugh is lying. His upbringing explains why. byShamus Khan highlights the twisted ethics of an infamous political character causing an intense debate in the nation’s present news.Corrupt morals can be determined by observing the motives of peoples’ unethical behaviors. This is because the purpose behind an action is the deciding factor of whether an act is virtuous or unprincipled. Equally as important as the motivation behind the action is how one deciphers between right and wrong. The use of this comprehension for the greater benefit is seldom seen. The lasting effects of the original unconscionable thought process can be seen in how Americans treat one another in modern society. Americans are generally unforgiving of natural human behavior, even if it is in a positive and affectionate way; an article titled Still Puritan After All These Years by Matthew Hutson investigates a psychological study focusing on this common insensitivity. Unadmirable behavioral habits developed during the Puritan times; these habits have yet to cease. Immorality is clearly depicted through corrupt motives and a distorted view of good versus bad; this societal red flag can be observed since its origin during Puritan times and has maliciously persisted until present-day America.
The mental focus in today’s society revolves around personal reputation and a false idea of success due to the prioritization of shallow concepts since America was formed. A Washington Post article titled “Kavanaugh is lying. His upbringing explains why.” by Shamus Khan articulates why a popular figure in America’s politics is strikingly unethical and the reasoning behind it,
How could a man who appears to value honor and the integrity of the legal system explain this apparent mendacity? How could a man brought up in some of our nation’s most storied institutions — Georgetown Prep, Yale College, Yale Law School — dissemble with such ease? The answer lies in the privilege such institutions instill in their members, a privilege that suggests the rules that govern American society are for the common man, not the exceptional one… No wonder that, when the poor lie, they’re more likely to do so to help others, according to research by Derek D. Rucker, Adam D. Galinsky and David Dubois, whereas when the rich lie, they’re more likely to do it to help themselves (Khan).
Despite having the privilege of attending some of America’s prestigious educational facilities alongside other perks of being white and wealthy, Kavanaugh never developed into a morally correct man. The controversial discussion regarding whether or not Kavanaugh is lying punctuates signs of his flawed intellect. This “upbringing” in the title of the article not only implies the upbringing of a privileged man but also the upbringing of the United States itself. In this nation, there is a clear prioritization of the wealthy, disregarding the majority of America’s population: the common person who lacks privilege and is typically poor. The epitome of this predicament are the political figures that are not involved for the U.S. government and the health of society but more so their own pride. Morality comes down to right and wrong. To succeed as a powerful figure in the name of your own pride defeats the purpose of this power at all. Kavanaugh and other controversial and ostensibly unethical political figures are not why America is morally corrupt, they are the result of a flawed society that has been corrupted for centuries. Since the beginning of time, people have struggled to succeed in a society that values reputation so heavily. Due to this heavy weight on reputation, people began to become extremely private. However, doing bad things to create an outwardly moral and just appearance has existed since America’s origin. Kavanaugh’s attempted deception is a perfect example of lying to create a superficial perfect outward appearance to the public for personal gain. The author asks the same question that every person involved in this political controversy is asking: Why is he lying? The answer is simply for success. The success that the American dream depicts is one with money, power, and a good reputation. He is lying for his own selfish success because America was built as a society where a good reputation with a powerful foundation is vital for success. This good reputation has always been forceful motivation in America, but for a political figure, the audience has grown to be that much more important. The more powerful and toxic this shallow motivation becomes, the less moral the action.
No action can be truly morally correct if the motivation for it is defective. Distorted motives have been a flaw in the people of Puritan society and unfortunately in modern American society as well. The importance of the motivation behind any action, sinful or pure, is clearly depicted in The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne which is a novel set in Puritan times and developed in response to the strict Puritan ideals: “But this had been a sin of passion, not of principle, nor even purpose” (196). Sinning as a response to passion or falling under pressure holds a dirtier value than an act committed with logical reasoning behind it. Hester, the main character in The Scarlet Letter, cheats on her husband with a man she falls deeply in love with named Dimmesdale. When she committed adultery, it provided benefit for no one but herself. This solely personal reward at the cost of someone else’s happiness is what made her sin so harsh. For a modern example, the current American government treats murder differently based on the situation, more specifically, the motivation. To kill to protect yourself or another, or to kill for the nation’s pride in a war is seen differently than to kill for money or malicious urge, which is treated as outrageously cruel. In the eyes of America’s government, the motivation is what holds the weight of the action. Motivation is the true decider in a righteous action versus a sinful one. America’s government has judged people upon the purpose of their actions over the action itself since Puritan times. Additionally, the reason Americans sin has stayed just as selfish and immoral as well. People are constantly searching for a reward for their generous acts which is an immoral and unjust mindset. However, this natural greed for personal pleasure will never cease to exist. Aiming for an outcome including compensation has stained the moral compasses of Americans and established damaging customs in the way people treat each other.
Social aspects of America have been greatly altered in the individual actions between one another due to the reality of human flaw; the reason that America has not become more moral since Puritan times lies in the ignorance of natural human imperfection. In a play titled The Crucible by Arthur Miller, John Proctor admits to his natural human behavior of sinning and the way the knowledge gained from that experience affected how he treats other people in society: “I speak my own sins; I cannot judge another. I have no tongue for it” (141).To understand that mistakes are a natural part of being human is what makes this quote so important. Many people in The Crucible, a play representing people of Puritan times, are extremely cruel and not understanding of one another. To this day, understanding others’ mistakes and imperfections still prove to be a great challenge in the way people react to these inevitable occurrences. For example, in The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne, adultery caused Hester embarrassment for the rest of her life when in today’s society it is simply frowned upon, but that is still not the level of sympathy that should be mutually felt in everyday society. Aside from what is seen in the public reaction of these mistakes, national morality is still horribly corrupt because the judgment is still unforgiving and apparent. The methods have changed, but the morals behind it have not. For example, the use of technology to learn potentially false information while avoiding confrontation has trapped America in a state of immoral ignorance due to lacking the benefits of true understanding through debate. John Proctor from the play, The Crucible, proves this ignorance to be an issue as it highlights the importance of acknowledging imperfection. This realization becomes a pivotal event in the novel because it deserves to be common knowledge. Unfortunately, this complex concept is still uncommon wisdom as the common public still struggles to act with this idea in mind. This is essential knowledge to achieve mutual understanding. America’s lack of acceptance concerning human flaws has set society up for an inability to gain pure moral perception; this shortcoming persists in political and mundane social aspects of civilization.
The Puritan history that the United States was built upon has been negatively affecting how American society treats natural human behavior in its past, present, and even its future. Matthew Hutson depicts the last effects of society during Puritan times that are still prevalent in America today in an article called Still Puritan After All These Years,
Whatever these Americans explicitly believed (or didn’t believe) about God, something like Puritan values seemed to be guiding their moral judgments. Protestant attitudes about work may also influence how Americans treat their co-workers. Calvin argued that socializing while on the job was a distraction from the assignment God gave you. The psychologist Jeffrey Sanchez-Burks has found that Protestants — but not Catholics — become less sensitive to others’ emotions when reminded of work, possibly indicating a tendency to judge fraternizing as unproductive and unprofessional. He and collaborators have also found that Americans have a culturally specific tendency to view family photos and other personal items as unprofessional presences in the office (Hutson).
America is overwhelmingly unforgiving when it comes to others’ personal expressions. Since the beginning of America’s existence, people have been turning a blind eye to the reality of human behavior. People judge one another for basic human behavior. Not just any human behavior, but affectionate, positive, and natural human behavior. This insensitivity originated in a disregard for the private aspects of life back in the colonial era. During Puritan times, private things were exactly that, private. Nowadays, a lack of openness is still seen through judgements of things undeserving of it. Seen in more than just mere traces, this can be observed in all aspects of American society, from the government as a whole to a social life at work. How did Americans become so unaware of the functioning of their own human behavior?Ignorance and selfishness originating from the birth of America created the lack of righteous motivation, inevitably distorting American society’s view of right and wrong permanently. America started off ignorant and never grew to change. The most basic morals should be obvious due to the way humans naturally behave, but America was set up for failure due to social habits developed early in Puritan times that disregarded this fact. America has remained with corrupt morals since then and it has been harmfully affecting the moral maturity of the United States from a governmental scale down to the individual perspective of each other and the rest of the world. The everlasting and consistent poor morals of American society can be traced back to the ignorance that began to develop as a cultural habit during its infancy and lack of growth moving forward.
My home was once very messy. A lack of being swept caused the dust on the floor to shift into nightmarish feathers empty, yet thickly built of remains. Always as dimly lit as a shadow, the darkness embraced me when no one else could. However, not quite like a shadow, as a shadow requires even the merest amount of light. I can’t remember if the inside ever felt dark or not because I was never paying attention to it. Every second I spent in my home was occupied by staring out the window. A picture had fallen off the wall leaving the frame disassembled on the floor, but I never bothered to pick it up, let alone put it back together. I did not dare to glance at what the frame held within it. This image not only scared and hurt me, but it made me miss a better time. I missed when there weren’t cobwebs in the darkest corners of my home. I miss when dark hallways weren’t the focus while walking around a place I called my home. I hated feeling like home as a place that is stiff and somber. The scariest part of my home was not the house itself, but the things that were inside of it. Beautifully crafted wooden walls were no longer art to me, rather they were prison bars that kept me listless.
But that was a long time ago. I decided to spend summer cleaning out each corner of my home that evoked any type of sadness: the cobwebs, the broken picture frame, and I finally turned on the lights. I watched my own shadow dance on the wall instead of the shadows of the people outside. Art layered on top of art created a masterpiece of my own; shadows painted the walls of the enclosure I was confined in by choice, bound by nothing else but my own desire. I developed a healthier and more productive routine; the most important aspect being time spent talking to the people that I love. The people that fill me with the energy that keeps the lights on.
Today my home is kept clean and the lights are always on. I spend my time looking at my home and the people inside it rather than constantly looking out of my windows. Every person in my home is loved and belongs. The picture frame is restored, and it rests on the desk I study on, but now it is no longer a picture that retains memories of pain. Inside this frame is a picture that holds a short-lived good time, and although it is over I’m glad it happened. The picture remains the same image it always has been. The less I spend looking out the window, the more I appreciate what is within my own.
My home is my mind, anywhere I am loved is where I feel most loved. But, in order to feel loved I had to stop paying attention to the chaos around me and direct my attention on myself. My home didn’t feel like a home until I felt the love that was there. The love always had been there, but I needed to see and appreciate that love in order for it to make the impact it deserves in my life.
Sometimes, something goes wrong in my home. A window breaks or I start letting the dishes pile up again. Whatever it is, I take a minute to look at the people in my home and love them. If I need their support I no longer shy away from asking for help. I always end up getting back on track and when I catch myself looking out the windows too much, I always remind myself to pull the curtain down and focus on the most important thing. My happiness. At last, my home is a happy, clean home filled with the most important figures in my life. Thank you to those who are helping me make this happen. My home wouldn’t be a true home, but a house, without each and every one of you.
Great-grandmother told me about a book she read in grade school many many years ago. It was called Wonder. She didn’t tell me who wrote it because they were American. The boy in the story wore a space helmet because of a disease that ruined his face. I get to wear a full space suit because I’m sick on the inside. Not the outside. The word for wonder is beautiful in French, that’s where great-grandmother was before the box closed. Now people aren’t allowed into our country so we have to act like we never knew the outside existed. Great grandmother tells me about how pretty France is but I’m not allowed to know about France. If I remember the pretty tower in Paris I have to keep it in my own box, the box in my head. Sometimes things come out of the front door by accident though. In the newspaper, someone got in trouble for saying the French phrase for “I miss you” but it’s so much prettier in French. They’re on vacation now great-grandma says, but the newspaper says he was sent to ‘Execution’ and but I’ve never heard of that place so it must be really foreign.
Newspapers have always been helpful with the newest scientific research being presented. How to make the kids live longer. Annya always knew that she would have to watch Sadao die. He was a clever little boy, always seeming to know what to say when Annya fell into her rabbit hole of worries. A sort of inner connection to anyone he spoke to, Sadao could always tell how someone was feeling even if they hid it. In the meantime, Sadao is still a little boy going to school with his great-grandmother in tow, he used to have to be carried but new technology continued to come out as ways to help kids be able to be more independent. Every day, kids are weaker than yesterday. Society runs off of the elderly as they have stronger bones, stronger veins, stronger souls than the youngest. Sadao’s mother died 2 years ago, his grandmother still living in the part of Japan where the soil was still rich, unlike the contaminated soil of our town. This is where the factories are. This is where the real Japan is. This is what we are keeping from the rest of the world. Since Fukushima, negative effects are ringing throughout the country’s veins, intoxicated its blood so that only a few towns remain safe. So great-grandparents and their great-grandsons and great-granddaughters stay in Japan’s weak links. The strongest and weakest of society left to praise things as simple as clementines because their own blood left them.
Sadao amazes me more than any other child. The other day at breakfast he told me to stop reading the newspaper because he can see my air getting thicker when I do. He’s a clever little boy, but not that means nothing now. No matter how smart he is, he can hardly walk. All people need is for children to be healthy, but most die before their parents. Everyone dies before us great-grandparents. Sadao’s generation seems to be the last. Japan has become so deeply ill that the people living on its land are becoming just as ill. What a dreadful time to be a pediatrician! All our children are breaking. All our children are broken.
When a country breaks. When it’s soul dies. What happens to the people that made it? My generation has been working for years to make this country great, we still work at age 110 and older. The fundamentals of this country are being tossed to the side with no positive future in sight. We are worked to the bone living off of rice and giving all the milk our cows produce to our children hoping they stop losing their teeth. Japan’s bone are breaking just as much as our children’s’ bones. I’m starting to think my future may outlast Sadao’s. Even worse, my country’s.
The perplexing antagonist in The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne, Pearl, is the human embodiment of the everlasting mystery: can a sin truly be undone? She is Hester’s challenge to overcome even more so than Chillingworth is due to how deeply she cares for Pearl. It is easier to ignore and fight a problematic person that you care little for than it is to nurture a problematic person to a healthier, more passive state of being. Unfortunately, Pearl and Chillingworth were not the only problems that Hester faced. The Puritanism lifestyle is a belief system derived from the Catholic Church, but the Catholic religion is typically much more forgiving of sin. The strictness of Puritanism made it difficult to live in a natural way with an occasional misstep. Hester committed a sin that in modern day society would be shameful, however still not strictly punished and exposed to a point past mortification. That being said, a sin is a sin nonetheless, and in Hester’s world what she did was severely offensive and consequences were certainly received. Pearl, the result of that sin was additionally received and changed Hester’s life in a plethora of ways. The good and bad aspects of Pearl’s nature are the driving factors in Hester’s success. Although difficult at times, the benefits outweigh the hardships of her journey as a mother to Pearl. Pearl was Hester’s blessing disguised as a punishment for her sin because although raising a misbehaving kid was hard, the knowledge and joy that Pearl brought Hester are immeasurable benefits that exceed these challenges.
Pearl’s affinity for troublemaking makes her separate from the rest of the kids, but more importantly pushes her mom too far in already precarious situations. Early on in The Scarlet Letter while Pearl was still fairly young, she decides to further degrade her and her mother’s reputation among the important members of the town: “After putting her finger in her mouth, with many ungracious refusals to answer Mr. Wilson’s question, the child finally announced that she had not been made at all, but had been plucked by her mother off the bush of wild roses, that grew by the prison door” (Hawthorne 100). Although mortifying and damaging her already unstable and poor reputation, it was worth what these judgments taught them about people, even the people at the top of the chain. The leaders of there town were spectators in the conversation and watched Pearl give an answer that questioned Pearl’s faith in God, which directly related to what Hester was teaching her. By questioning her ability to be a good mother, Pearl risks her mother losing custody of her as it is currently a controversial issue among the town. Pearl not only knowingly mortified her mother but also jeopardized Hester’s custody of her and her position in the town which was already impaired. All of this simply because she has a knack for trouble. Her consistent rudeness toward her mother increases the poorness of her reputation and stability as a happy person. This is degrading and painful for Hester extremely often. Luckily, a new perspective taught her impressive concepts that were luckily passed onto Pearl. However, her mother was not the only teacher in her life.
Puritan society is a brutal lifestyle that has very strict laws and customs that must be followed, this acted as an instructor to Pearl on how to become independent and brave. To be set apart from this society because Pearl knows what is truly right in her mind speaks volumes about her strong and independent nature. Before defending herself and her mother, the narrator describes the feelings Pearl retains regarding Puritan customs and the way the Puritan children treat others in inhumane and unfair ways, “She saw the children of the settlement, on the grassy margin of the street, or at domestic thresholds, disporting themselves in such grim fashion as the Puritanic nurture would permit… Pearl saw, and gazed intently, but never sought to make acquaintance” (Hawthrone 84). Pearl developed a personal knowledge of where she belongs in society by her own will. Although she was an outcast and society shamed her, she did not belong in Puritan society to begin with and the exclusion was just confirmation of where she contently belonged. The drive and love for her mother made her get defensive and act in extremely brave ways. This is impressive for such a young girl, but when people are rude it’s important to develop this powerful mindset that will continue to grow within herself as a person. Luckily Hester is not stopping this growth, although it is very bold in this type of society. Independence grew through Pearl, and the exclusion of her daughter proved Hester that she may be a strong and powerful outcast as well. Strength, bravery, and independence are not the only traits that Pearl possesses.
Pearl is wise beyond her years because her mother and teacher in life developed a new perspective on society that gave her knowledge worth passing onto Pearl and she as well gained extra intelligence by experiencing life shamefully since birth. As a relationship between Hester and Dimmesdale rekindles, Pearl picks up on the peculiarities of it and recognizes how unnatural it is to have to hide love from the public eye. Pearl questions,
‘What a strange, sad man is he!’ said the child, as if speaking partly to herself. ‘In the dark night-time, he calls us to him, and holds thy hand and mine, as when we stood with him on the scaffold yonder! And in the deep forest, where only the old trees can hear, and the strip of sky see it, he talks with thee, sitting on a heap of moss! And he kisses my forehead, too, so that the little brook would hardly wash it off! But, here, in the sunny day, and among all the people, he knows us not; nor must we know him! A strange, sad man is he, with his hand always over his heart!’ (Hawthorne 210)
To understand the complexity of relationships to this extent is impressive for any person of any age, let alone a child. The bond betwixt love and the Puritan society customs is yet another idea that is challenging to fathom, because of how unnaturally spurious it is. The knowledge that sin taught Hester and passed onto Pearl is a lesson that can only be taught through the experiences it put both of them through. The benefit of each tricky situation they encountered taught them another lesson about the functions of people, relationships, humiliation, and sin.
The journey that Pearl and Hester preserved through together is the catalyst in the knowledge that put them above all others in their town. Although separated from the rest of the town and harshly alone at times, Pearl and Hester were self-governing and bold as the narrator states after they faced yet another conflict with the townspeople, “Mother and daughter stood together in the same circle of seclusion from humans: and in the nature of the child seemed to be perpetuated those unquiet elements that had distracted Hester Prynne before Pearl’s birth, but had since gun to be soothed away by the softening influences of maternity” (Hawthorne 85). If not for the exertions that came of Hester’s sin and Pearl’s development, they would have never transpired as prosperous or judicious as they achieved in obtaining a standard of prosperity that everyone strives for, happiness. The knowledge and growth Pearl provided for Hester outweighs the hardships that came with raising her, Pearl is the true angel in Hester’s life although sometimes disguised as a devil due to the struggles.
What is problematic about seeing the world through rose-colored glasses? Although some argue that ignorance is bliss, the Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald is a magnificent illustration of how a distorted perspective can affect how a story is comprehended by its’ audience. Relying heavily on facade becomes a problem in the novel when the truth starts peeking through. When reality mixes with delusion, all perspectives are warped based on what they hear from others and what they can only hazily see. All these factors create a conflicting story that is challenging to tell properly. This novel shows that it is nearly impossible to achieve an accurate portrayal based on how different peoples’ worldviews are. A delusional perspective can mislead the outlook of others which is highlighted as a continuous conflict in the novel. The lesson of understanding how alternate outlooks clash with one another is one aspect of what makes this novel deserving as a highly regarded title in American literature.
A deceiving facade created many thickly delusional perspectives in the characters in the novel. For example, George Wilson is torn up by the lies of his wife Myrtle as she was having an affair. He explains how although she could maintain her facade to the rest of society she would have to know that she was not the person she made herself out to be, “‘I spoke to her,’ he muttered, after a long silence. ‘I told her she might fool me but she couldn’t fool God. I took her to the window’ -with an effort he got up and walked to the rear window and leaned with his face pressed against it-’ and I said ‘ God knows what you’ve been doing, everything you’ve been doing. You may fool me, but you can’t fool God!’” (159). George had been floating through life ignoring his wife’s affair for a long time, but her facade could only keep her secret so safe. Many of the characters in the Great Gatsby struggle with keeping their reputation clean or even just believable despite what goes on behind the scenes. Gatsby is an especially interesting character because the general public has a very distorted view of him and he is constantly surrounded by false rumors. He is also entirely delusional about his personal relationship with Daisy and struggles with leaving the past in the past. Despite all the deception and genuine falsehood, the truth peeks out once in a while and creates a foggy picture. This delusion greatly shifts each individual’s perspectives and therefore shifts the story we receive as readers.
The importance of perspective is clearly articulated and proves that the way that perspective intertwines with delusion shifts the telling of reality into a distorted story. Gatsby waits for Daisy in the bushes, watching over her as an act of love, but he does not understand that the feeling is not eternally mutual, “He put his hands in his coat pockets and turned back eagerly to his scrutiny of the house, as though my presence marred the sacredness of the vigil. So I walked away and left him standing there in the moonlight- watching over nothing” (145). Nick pities Gatsby for his oblivion to the reality of his relationship with Daisy. He fell in the love her and held on to the idea of her for way too long. As Gatsby waits patiently in the bushes watching over Daisy, he truly is watching over nothing. She is not his, and that is something his mind will not let him understand. Gatsby’s distorted view of the world becomes more obvious as Nick gets to know him better. However, Nick’s obsession with Gatsby and his personality as a whole greatly influences the story we, as readers, receive. If the story were told by Gatsby, the novel would be almost entirely about Daisy and Gatsby’s past and expected future with her. Nick’s perspective entirely shapes how we view the story. It is what allows us to see what occurs after Gatsby’s death, and gives us the view of what it is like to be an outsider as well as a part of the West Egg and East Egg cultures. The effect of the story of the Great Gatsby is entirely dependent on who is telling the story and this can go for the real world too. Keeping a good reputation is important for success, but sometimes this can evolve into a sickly false veneer that alters the way people are viewed. The level of falsehood that a successful facade can create has the power to shift the course of a person’s entire life. The way people are viewed relies on what is seen and heard from them and when perspective and opinion intervenes, the story can become unclear. Being limited to one’s own perspective is a struggle that the entire population deals with. For example, the potential effects of what you put on social media affecting your job or your college acceptance. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald continues to maintain it’s fame by teaching the world the harmful effects a delusional outlook can have. This novel connects to and motivates generations of the past and future to stay open-minded to conflicting viewpoints and alerts them to the facades of the many businesses, products, and people that we encounter on a daily basis making it a fitting novel to be taught year after year in American society.
There was a particular cadence of chatter that rattled through the streets that began with a first heel that clicked on the pavement as a first coattail drifted behind a lady walking with intention. By the late afternoon, her former pace will have slowed after a long day of work and a group of friends are just beginning their day at the venue with the most drinking and the worst music. At the museum down the block, a fundraiser started about fifteen minutes ago, glasses of champagne clinked while more guests arrived after having straightened their ties in the car mirror only twenty minutes prior. In a New York minute, a Jewish girl and a Catholic man married while a black girl and a black mother smiled at the white woman they met via glance in the bathroom, and the businesswoman with the dancing coattail came home to a husband who spent his day taking care of their newborn baby. And before this miracle was born, when this very same pavement held up white people rioting during the chaos and mayhem of the Reconstruction Era and eyes were glazed over by blinding ignorance, this heterogeneous population may have stunned those that this city consisted of; one hundred years later, but what progress has been made?
Every respectable person within ten thousand blocks of midtown knows that we lived in an ugly world. A world where your school picture would be judged more for being black than if you excelled at science; that is the disgusting reality of the inside walls of a closed mind.
At least I have lived in a world where I can kiss a black person without judgment and the boy that called me a chink was told to be nice and I was apologized to. During the late hours of a mesmerizing sunset when the city of dreams began to contribute greatly to the myth of light pollution, a gay couple is harassed for holding hands. On social media, a gay man was a faggot and a woman that wore a suit was a dyke.
By some miracle, American individuals have grown. Pockets of beautiful diversity have flourished and are thriving in our nation’s largest cities but as I bask in the glory of a diverse world I find myself disappointed nonetheless. I gape at the world spinning out of control as fast as Mercury’s orbit wishing that the Romans may send a worldwide message.
People push through one another as if they have a more important destination than the person to their left not caring about anything other than their own journey. People splash puddles on the feet of the girl with the heels from Prada but the true devil is the more envious soul. Some people silently beg these ill-mannered individuals to be nicer in the middle of the night; the ceiling always reflecting on the material world more than the people living in it and something about that fact results in a tear or two on the pillow cases they sleep on.
Suddenly the curtain is not keeping out the shadows but bringing in the sunshine. Coattails begin flying like doves released at a wedding and arguments drown out among the laughter of mixed couples seemingly skipping from one street corner to the next; the working woman’s coat tail flicks up before resting and her heels click on the crosswalk and I realize why this city never sleeps. The sun has made our world brighter.
How does a writer make a reader curious? By presenting a question that needs an answer. Curiosity is the first step to gaining focus. Relating directly to the reader’s emotions is important in order to maintain it. Writers use literary devices to subtly bond readers focus to the scene and take them along for the ride of intensity, in this case, the unforeseen confrontation between Pete and Jimmie in a bar. It’s important to keep the reader wrapped up in the scene, especially during conflict or a sudden progression, this hostile scene being both of these. To bring attention to the tone of the conflict as it developed into a skirmish Stephen Crane, the author of Maggie: A Girl of the Streets, conveyed a newly exposed resentment between Pete and Jimmie in a violent scene through a complex use of simple literary tools such as repetition and metaphors.
Focus is the first step to writing a piece that truly resonates with the reader. Pete and Jimmie’s conflict escalated so quickly that Stephen Crane relied on striking curiosity in his audience and presenting the finest details in a simple yet efficient manner to maintain this necessary attention. In his novel, Maggie: A Girl of the Streets, Crane introduced a character that grabbed the reader’s attention and continued to hold onto it as the scene intensified, “The quiet stranger moved himself and his glass a trifle further away and maintained an attitude of oblivion” (53) The first mention of the quiet stranger is instantly perplexing for the audience. This curiosity is how Stephen Crane gets his reader’s focus. It is vital for a writer to get its readers focus and continue to maintain it, otherwise, the writing itself will not be appreciated in its full value. In the bar fight scene, due to its dramatic shift into conflict, to maintain this focus is even more important. Maggie: A Girl of the Streets as a whole is a fast-paced book as it spans over a lifetime. In order not to confuse his audience, Stephen Crane condenses all the information his audience needs to know into shorter and simpler phrases. The quiet stranger being a perfect example of this. This character was not just a way to maintain focus, but to also set the tone of the scene as it plays out.
Once the reader’s focus is acquired, the writing itself must then be consistently intriguing. Stephen Crane uses a metaphor in order to set the tone of the bar fight scene and highlight the tension that grows as the scene progresses. The feeling of shock and disarray follows in the readers as well as in the quiet stranger after Pete and Jimmie’s brawl and is represented by the final mention of the quiet stranger, “The quiet stranger had sprawled out very pyrotechnically out on the sidewalk. A laugh ran up and down the avenue for the half of a block” (56) As unfamiliar as a stranger may seem, this quiet stranger is a lot closer to the audience than expected. Rather than a simple character, the emotions and actions of the quiet stranger represent the shifting in tone of the scene. As the scene intensified, the quiet stranger properly reacted. The reactions of the quiet stranger correlate directly to how Crane wanted his readers to respond as the fight began to develop. This tension that the quiet stranger feels is what Crane intended his audience to experience as well. All the tension in this scene quickly turns into fear and an underlying sense of being uncomfortable with the anger between two people that were once friends. Pete and Jimmie had some distrust for one another and it all came bursting out in this one scene. Since the beginning, when Pete wasn’t letting Jimmie get in a word during their conversations about Pete’s courageousness, Jimmie has always felt tucked away by Pete and his rather large ego. When all this irritation rises to the surface, the scene quickly spirals out of control and is clearly seen in the quiet strangers’ reactions. Turns out, the quiet stranger was not much of a stranger at all, but a metaphor for the readers themselves. However, a good metaphor wasn’t the only thing that made the bar fight scene so significant; this scene had many important and sudden changes throughout the course of just a few pages and this needed to be properly handled.
Stephen Crane grabbed his reader’s attention and provoked curiosity that held, but he needed to maintain it throughout the scene as the tone shifted. He used simple literary devices to their full extent in order to keep consistent. This one of the many things that made his novel, Maggie: A Girl of the Streets, so powerful. Besides the concept of a quiet stranger, Stephen Crane brings up previous ideas about violence and trust to more effectively mark the change in previously amicable manners between the former friends when Pete says to Jimmie, “Drink yer stuff an’ git out an’ don’ make no trouble” (51) Back before Pete and Jimmie met on bad terms in the bar, Pete would tell Jimmie stories of his deceptively courageous past with other various men in other various bars and alleys. In reality, Pete is hypocritical to tell other men not to cause trouble while he often starts fights. In proof of his ironic quality, Pete would often say to these men to not make any trouble. This phrase soon become so common that the audience knew this indicated that a physical fight was bound to start. Foreshadowing for this tension can also be seen in Pete’s storytelling when Jimmie is pushed beneath Pete while his sickly vainglorious tendencies become more apparent, “Jimmie nodded understandingly. Over his features played an eager desire to state the amount of his valor in a similar crisis, but the narrator proceeded” (25) Pete seemed like a sign of hope as he was someone that Jimmie may look up to. Clearly, something changed as the bar fight scene is the result of a growing tension between the two. However, the underlying distrust for Pete seemed to have always been there. The bar fight is crucial to the novel as it changes a lot of what could’ve been if Pete and Jimmie became closer and more trusting in one another. By being repetitive in certain phrases, Stephen Crane was able to maintain his reader’s focus in not just the bar fight scene, but throughout the novel as a whole. He did this by using simple yet effective tools such as repetition, metaphors, and prioritizing the reader’s focus. He also used repetition in an unorthodox way, by stretching it out to develop a feeling of a recurring idea. In the case of the quiet stranger, it was the continuous build up of fear and tension. In the case of the order of “don’ make no trouble”, the recurring idea of Pete’s hypocrisy built the feeling of distrust for him in the audience. Stephen Crane’s literary style and use of metaphors and repetition enforced the focus and tone that makes the bar fight scene so significant.The mixture of literary tools is what truly brought out the best in Stephen Crane’s first novel, Maggie: A Girl of the Street; this is what provoked readers to magnify on what the scene signified. As the pace of this scene increased and the violence developed, Crane didn’t shy away from telling his audience exactly how they were meant to feel by his use of the quiet stranger as a metaphor. Emanated through precisely worded metaphors and repetition of subtle yet striking ideas, the bitterness that turns physical between Pete and Jimmie in Stephen Crane’s novel, Maggie: A Girl of the Streets, is a rollercoaster ride that the readers are rightfully intrigued by from the beginning and until its conclusion.
Women are an embodiment of innocence in the novel. Standing to represent society and its’ ignorance of the war but also stereotyping women as softer and more innocent individuals. This stereotype benefits the men in a way that is necessary for their own survival. The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien uses women to represent a number of different symbols through the novel, such as innocence, ignorance, hope, and strength. An original stereotype of women that used to give men power in society changed into a necessary perspective in order to have women become hope for the men once they were sent to war. Mary Anne Bell is an embodiment of vulnerability to the way demolishing her ignorance for the war and replacing it with a connection and an appreciation that gave her the bravery to become the war herself. The way the men had dreamed about Mary Anne Bell, as well as other female characters in the novel, gave the men a certain amount of protection from the war. Fantasizing about gentle and innocent women protected the parts of them that could feel love, as the war often desensitizing and broke men. The innocent and degrading image of women commonly seen through The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien is not showing men as powerful, but rather the complete opposite; men are weakened by the war, and the stereotype of women being gentle and innocence gives them something to dream about amidst such a harsh reality.
Females in the novel stand to represent characteristics that men believe they should have, despite whether or not these characteristics are real or not in an effort to hold onto some fantasy for their own motivation. In The Things They Carried by Tim O’Brien, Jimmy Cross dreams about Martha as a girl to dream about and as a woman that he could’ve had sex with, “Her legs, he thought, were almost certainly the legs of a virgin… He should’ve carried her up the stairs to her room and tied her to the bed and touched that left knee all night long” (O’Brien 4). These two contrasting dreams stand to represent what a woman means to a man in society and what a woman means to a man in the war. There’s no real proof that Martha is or isn’t a virgin, however, that’s not the point of Jimmy Cross’ fantasy. A virgin is the symbol of innocence. It speaks to a gentle image, especially in a woman. He always pictured Martha as sweet and gentle, noting her most gentle features such as her weight and her knee. This quote represents the contrast of emotions he felt toward Martha. Part of him dreamt of her as a symbol of innocence to observe, the other dreamt of dominating her. Although she is an English major back in the states and he is stuck in Vietnam, he still manages to be painfully in love with her, holding onto that fantasy of her to keep him going through the tough times in the war. His distorted perspective of females may be more of a way to fool himself into happiness rather than to put women beneath himself. The delicate image of women shifts drastically later in the book when Mark Fossie’s girlfriend is introduced.
Mary Anne Bell was seen as nothing more than a girl, she shocked the boys when she went out with the Greenies. She was never the same after she got in touch with herself in Vietnam. This transition was surprising simply because she was a girl, nothing more than a sexist assumption made by the soldiers that felt lost in this place she felt so bare in. Tim O’Brien speaks through Rat Kiley’s voice to directly state that general presumptions made about women are incorrect and they are stronger than men often expect, “‘You got these blinders on about women. How gentle and peaceful they are. All that crap about how if we had a pussy for president there wouldn’t be no more wars. Pure garbage. You got to get rid of that sexist attitude’” (O’Brien 102). Rat Kiley gives Mitchell Sanders a lesson as he saw how Mary Anne changed. The war changed her in a way that the men had never seen it change someone before. Mary Anne Bell was a very strong and thoughtful woman. She came into the war with an open mind and became Vietnam herself. Originally, she was often referred to in a way that implied that she was only brave because she knew nothing about the real war. The rest of society did not truly understand the war, and never would without being placed directly into the fire. This representation of ignorance for the war slowly shifted into a complete embodiment of Vietnam and the war itself after she learned what the war truly was. Eddie Diamond had previously referred to her as having ‘D-cup guts, trainer bra brains.’ This implies that he thought she did not fear the war because she did not understand. As if her bravery was provoked by ignorance, but this was not the case. This sexist assumption is a reality and is prevalent throughout the story. This woman, Mary Anne Bell, was strong in a way that the rest of the men could comprehend and shocked every one of them. Rat Kiley picked up on this and accepted it, he then shares what he knows. In this quote, it is more than speaking to Mitchell Sanders. This quote is a lesson for the reader and every soldier in the book to learn. Women can be massively strong, vulnerable, and knowledgeable in the same situations that can be difficult for a man, but they are still not on equal playing fields at any point throughout the novel for one reason. This delusional sexism helps the men stay alive.
Dreaming of woman as stereotypically weak and gentle benefitted the men as it gave them something to hold on to, women were symbols of hope for the men. Tim O’Brien describes in detail the way that Jimmy Cross’s fantasy about Martha hurt the people around him, but occupied his mind with something greater and more hopeful than the war, “Lieutenant Cross kept to himself. He pictured Martha’s smooth young face, thinking he loved her more than anything, more than his men, and now Ted Lavender was dead because he loved her so much and could not stop thinking about her” (O’Brien 6). Women affected the soldiers so deeply that they fell into a dreamlike state to escape from the war, even if for a second. This distracted from the task at hand, sometimes jeopardizing the safety of the other men. However, this distraction was necessary for mental stability. If not for daydreaming and storytelling, the men would be trapped in the harsh reality of the war. Women did not belong in the place that the soldiers’ minds set them in, but it was for their own selfish need to grip onto some gentle hope, real or fake. Each man had their own thing to hold onto, for Henry Dobbins it was his girlfriend’s stockings. The stocking held a sort of magic to Dobbins, even after he and his girlfriend broke up. This “magic” was the only form of hope these men had in the war. This distraction, as mentioned in the quote, could be the death of the people around the dreamer, but the dreamer would not stop fighting through the war themselves and that’s all that matters. This selfish way to protect was something each man had to do in their own way or else they would be nothing more than trauma and offensive jokes in an empty shell of a person.
No woman is the same, but each girl in this novel has a vital purpose to a man in this book. Tim O’Brien puts women in a true light in this novel and shows how the soldiers in this book had an incorrect and distorted view of females. The inaccurate fantasy of a woman kept them going, as hope or motivation it worked for many of the soldiers and was necessary to their perserverence through the war and through life following. Tim O’Brien crushed this stereotype of innocence typically related to women by using Mary Anne Bell as a figure that shifted drastically as a strong woman who put herself into the war environment and adapted with complete vulnerable to its harsh reality. She refused to be ignorant and innocence and ended up developed a very strong connection to Vietnam and the war itself. The false image of women as innocent and ignorant, much like American society during the time of the war, was a tool used by the men to persevere through the war by holding onto women as a symbol of happiness and hope. This puts men in an honest place of weaknesses and how women have the ability to be strong enough to lift them.
A beach made of pebbles and three towels lined along the shore, the sun dried us so our towels did not have to. I reached over Leah for the bag of chips and collided with Emma’s hand as she grabbed more for herself. We laughed and bantered while swimming and tanning and swimming some more. Capsizing the canoe for fun, soon to realize that a canoe full of water was overpowered the three of us. Dancing the can-can on a paddleboard until we all fell off one by one. This is what we called Camp David. Emma and Leah’s dad, David, would have his own adventurous activities on the weekends of summer because during the week, we went to a different camp. Ecoventure was a camp for youngsters to go on all the adventures Maine had to offer. Hiking was our least favorite, but the time we spent swimming made up for it. That, as well as catching miniature frogs at the state park. For lunch, we consumed the epitome of kid snacks. We feasted on sesame sticks, grapes, baby carrots, and extensive amounts of potato chips. Being lazy all summer was not even half as good as Ecoventure was, and Camp David was even better. Night swimming, watching movies, producing our own short films were the gems that Camp David had that Ecoventure did not. The distinctions of each give them both separate places in my core. This was what made my summers as a kid so memorable.
What makes something memorable? What I hear most often is people saying that you the things you remember the most vividly are often the toughest things you have to go through in life. I do not disagree, because it is fundamentally important for a brain to remember what went wrong to help avoid the same situation in the future. That being said, when I think of memories, I never think of the traumas in my life. I think of my best friends and me when we were only five and six years old. I think of one of the first Christmases I had with my mom and my dad together. I dream of the meals my grandfather would prepare for the whole family when we went to family reunions in New York. I remember how the hot pebbles felt on my toes at Camp David and how any sparkling sand beach in any exotic country will never be able to beat that feeling.
Reminiscing makes me crave future. My grandfather’s cooking makes me want to cook a five-course meal with my mom for our next family reunion. My first Christmas in Maine makes me want to spend time with just my parents more. Days lounging on the beach and filming skits with my best friends make me want to drive to New York and hang out with them this very minute. The eagerness of remembering the greatest moments of my life makes me feel not just alive, but it is what makes me want to keep on living. The catalyst in my life is my past and the people that made that past so significant. The people that are making the present a memory in the coming months, years, and decades of my entire life, are the ones that make me want to fight when things get troublesome and thrive when life is good. My past prompts my present to be alive, and my future to be prosperous.
I never would have guessed that the time my best friends and I got in trouble for catching frogs would be a memory that triggered severe nostalgia. In the moment, I was so wrapped up in the situation at hand that I was not concerned with the future, besides the short term of getting a talking to from my parents. I felt guilty and nervous, but now I look back on that moment and giggle to myself. The current life I live spending time in the library writing a paper during lunch, instead of sitting at the table with friends complaining about the school dining or the oppressive workloads, is the life we endure collectively. Now, I perch on an uncomfortable wooden chair, munching on sesame sticks and struggling to keep my time management up to par with the junior lifestyle. I do not know whether or not this is a moment I’ll grasp in my early twenties or even my late eighties.
All I know is that the present will become the past that I grip onto so dearly. The snapshots could be tennis late last night, without contacts, blindly trying to hit the ball entirely relying on my hearing. I remember the cadence of tennis balls and laughing mixing so smoothly together. I might remember my last AP Biology class, and how dearly I loved her lecture, but how the stress of finishing this paper outweighed that infatuation. Maybe I’ll remember the first argument I have with my boyfriend even more vividly than I remember the last. I may remember the first kiss the clearest, but when I remember the first time we looked at each other I still feel the overwhelming heat I felt burning so sweetly in my cheeks.
I do not know what recollections will remain in my mind endlessly, so I need live life knowing that the poor circumstances I find myself in may nevertheless hold just as much of a distinctive volume in my soul as the endearing moments of my maturing journey toward adulthood.
