Sin Letter

                                 Besides being born in the same town and going to elementary school together, we spent a lot of time together often playing soccer running from house to house or despising  the cold hands that pushed us to the bus station every school year. Even at such a tender age , we had found companionship in each other and trust had  culminated as a result of so many years of spending time together. Even though these times were the best always , there were ones that we were certainly  proud of  and relished. It almost seemed like Fred filled the gap between myself and my older siblings in a way that he was considered the seventh member of the family. The times we spent together were  absolutely  unparalleled. We could be gone for two days and our parents would know where we were. This bond was special not only because we were great friends, but the events involved in our childhood had made it inevitable not to feel like brothers.

We took the first steps toward school and church together. Such a friendship showed no signs of rockiness until we experienced our own challenges and one that would eventually make it stronger.

       As strong as it may seem now, those times when our brotherhood took a nosedive are ones that would never be repeated or none of us would like to see again. Call it sin, blunder,err or how good it might sound in the ears of the listener, it is something that remains one of the worst decisions in my life. Fred and on a saturday after after enjoying a game of football at the park got into an argument which ended up in a fight.the argument increasingly heated up since no one was ready to swallow the silence pill. Everything would have gotten better still at this point bt unfortunately, we continued as we walked toward my house. I found offensive some words uttered by Fred my best friend of ten years which made me propose to him whether he is man enough to stop talking too much and engage me in a duel.  

     At this point, tension had risen to the extent that pride was at stake and refusal might thrash his confidence so much that he might never consider playing football with the boys in the neighbourhood again. We exchanged derogatory remarks about each other until it got to a point where my heart landed right it my palm. Fred took the first hit, but retaliation was never a responsible option. Something that will hurt me for so long and could have potentially ruined our friendship.

       It didn’t take long for us to realize that for once, we had been selfish even though we never wanted to go bed mad but rather stay up and fight. Even though this was one of our favorite lines, it wasn’t meant to be tested on each other. Fred’s disappointment in himself was noticeable even to a five year old who couldn’t wait to ask “ freddy, of all the people in the world why should it be mike”and this was when he was walking alone to church for the first time in many years.  These were people who couldn’t wait for our friendship to be squash on the floor like pieces of paper so they could dump it in the garbage. These were people who would use their last energy to dismantle the bond between us than try to convey that energy in separating us when we were about fighting.They couldn’t wait to ridicule our friendship right in front of us.  I wasnt disappointed more  in them than i was in myself. Neither was I in fred. Rather it felt like the world had come to an end for me when i felt I had let fred down by not walking away just to save the day. At least if the anger and pride that had entangled me like a fish caught up in a net wouldnt let me walk away,the sound of the sniffing noses of these jealous people should had  made me do it.

      It was now all gone and my anger had let me down. I walked almost everywhere face down. My skin felt like a trunk of wood tied to the back of my neck. We are still great friends now. Sometimes we argue those moments strengthened our friendship , but it is obvious during these conversations each one of us feels deeply embarrassed. I had said not less than a thousand sorries to Fred after the incident. Even now i still walk up to him just tell him sorry for let him down , and this is about ten years after the fight. It is something i’ll remember for the rest of my life. The shame and pain from that one incident with my best friend was enough to teach me more lessons that the ones I’ve learnt in school.